Asmodeus and Interior Design

Asmodeus in Design Magazine

Asmodeus has been bringing his eclectic interests into our world, including some increasingly mainstream interviews. The latest issue of Design magazine has a detailed article about how he uses lava levels and minions to manage guest passage through his domain.

“You know that problem at every party where all the guests end up hanging out in the kitchen, getting in the way of the chef and picking at the food before it’s ready? With a subtle slope to the floor and initial thought to desired traffic patterns, you can keep nudging them toward the living room by simply adjusting the house lava level. I personally use the Echo Fire, and just tell Alexa to set lava to 15%. Within a few minutes it’s ankle deep, and I have my kitchen back.”

Asmo then discusses his method of creating a sort of performance space to establish and maintain dominance over visitors, with dance platforms and entertainment areas distributed around a central domain that is exclusively his own. He thus has no need to get up and follow guests into a new room, competing for seating or awkwardly standing on the periphery of an established conversation with the roles reversed. Winning a house party is all about initial design that drives traffic, keeping the host at the center of attention without anything so obviously symbolic and tacky as a throne.

“I don’t need that crap,” he roars with a somewhat manic grin. “I’m just Good-time Charley, a big ol’ party animal!” (An interesting side note is that the author of the article was killed by a lava ball at about this time during the interview, and to make issue deadline the piece was wrapped up hastily by editorial staff back at the office.)

Asmodeus has been sharing his techniques on a consulting basis with high-profile political, corporate, and religious clients worldwide… but this is the first time he has discussed interior design philosophy in mainstream media. It will be interesting to see if the architectural product space evolves to support such techniques, or if this will be of interest only to a powerful few.

This is part of the In Death: Unchained literature collection by Steven K. Roberts.